During the last decade, or so, being in love with myself, has taken on, a new meaning for me. Selfish as it may sound, the realisation has sunk in, that to love myself is the first step in building my confidence and the courage needed to face the world and come out, not only unscathed, but also successful in everything I do. 

Eat that George!

How can I be sure that it is actually my inner critic the one stopping me from moving forward, telling me this isn’t going to work out and not the voice of reason?

And that was my first question too, when I first started spotting that little voice, I didn’t even know directed my every action and that is why I am really excited to be sharing with you, these 5 Tips to help you recognize your inner critic.

Please read responsibly!

Sixteen years ago I learned an important life lesson, in the back of a New York City taxi cab. 

I hopped in a taxi, and we took off for Grand Central Station.  We were driving in the right lane when, all of a sudden, a black car jumped out of a parking space right in front of us. 

My taxi driver slammed on his brakes, skidded, and missed the other car by mere inches! The driver of the other car, the guy who almost caused a big accident, whipped his head around and started yelling bad words at us.  My taxi driver just smiled and waved at the guy.  And I mean, he was actually friendly! 

So, I asked him, "Why did you just do that? This guy almost ruined your car and could've sent us to the hospital!" 

And this is when my taxi driver told me about what I now call, "The Law of Garbage Trucks." 

So, are they?

Mine were. I was one of those people who toiled for many years because I doubted my ability to be my own boss. I doubted whether I was good enough to become a solopreneur, to run my own business or to make a difference in people’s lives, in a world filled with extremely gifted life coaches.

And the sneaky thing about those doubts was that they presenting themselves through George – you know George, my inner critic, my sweet little gremlin – . And George used his cunning PR skills to trick me into submission without putting up a fight.

He wasn’t throwing them in my face, he was just covering up for them while they crept into my subconscious so that I didn’t realize they’re there, tugging at me, wearing at me, grinding me to a stop.

But these doubts were there, even if I rarely thought about them. They were that silent voice in my head saying, “I can’t do it. I’m not good enough. I’d never make it. I’d only fail and embarrass myself. Why should I dare dream?”

They were there, and still are some times, and they were more powerful than I can put into words.

So, I decided to start small, with a little facebook page. I posted quotes and thoughts I needed to keep ME motivated. A few people liked my page, and commented on my posts. That was a fact. Hmmm…

I kept doing it, and kept getting good feedback, even if it was just from a handful of people. They believed in me, and encouraged me to continue posting, by commenting, and sharing my posts with their friends. That was also a fact. Interesting…

My wonderful husband Stelios supported me. My friends were proud of me, and that was a fact too. Every new person who liked, commented or shared one of my posts provided me with another proof that what I was doing had an actual impact on people’s lives … and that was a fact too.

And with every new, undisputed fact that came in, I was becoming more and more sure that my old doubts, were wrong. They were just flimsy façades that I had built up into something so solid they seemed indestructible. They seemed so real they were unquestionable, the foundation for my everyday reality.

But they were wrong, and now I had facts and solid data to prove it. And the very realization made me shiver. How could everything I had believed all these years be so wrong?

My reality today is different, because even though I had doubts, I still went ahead and did it anyway. I started small and I tested the waters. I was mindful of the results. I paid attention. And though I still have self doubts, I no longer let them define my reality. They’re just hypotheses, waiting to be tested by actual facts, waiting to be disproved.

Everyone has self doubts. That’s no excuse of not living your life the way you like it best. Just start doing it!

I have done it, thousands of others have done it. We are not better than you, we just did something relatively small, to test our doubts and then waited for the actual data to come in. We got the feedback, we disproved our doubts and we kept going.

If you are ready to swift gears in your life and make the rest of 2013 ROCK?

The Inspired for Life Sessions, -Six Hours of infinite possibility infused coaching for 100$- will help you reach more into yourself and be empowered by your own dreams! 

What are you waiting for? 

Jump on this chance and Be Inspired for Life! 

I’m already proud of you, just for reading this far, even though you have doubts about me and this blog. And I am proud you are willing to let some small light shine on the doubts quivering in the darkness.

Have you ever doubted your self and your ability to live life on your terms?
How do you handle your doubts?

Share your truth in the comment section bellow. Remember, we are all in this together...

Other Posts You Might Love:
7 Easy Steps To a Happy Life | Surprisingly Simple Ways To Living a Life of Happiness
Happiness | 5 Tips to help you work your way from grumpy to happy
Back to the Basics | The Importance of Picking your Battles in Everyday Life
Overcoming the Fear of Failure | How I Rejected the Illusions of Fear and you can too

About Me

Hi, I'm Nichole, and I am a Life Change Architect and a Motivational Speaker, Coaching, Writing and Running Workshops about Personal Growth and Positive Change. 

Connect with me on Facebook or email me at [email protected]

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Sometimes overanalysing situations, labelling events and trying to micromanage the universe, gives us a false sense of control or security. Locked into only one possible outcome we eliminate all other possibilities and that in it self can be comforting. But life is all about wonderful possibilities, continuous change and an infinite string of unpredictable moments that we are meant to experience as they come. 

I used to attach meaning to everything that happened to me. And I mean everything, from a client email, complaining about the service quality he has receiving to a broken pipe in the bathroom that flooded my entire apartment while I was at work, everything was immediately labeled as good or bad. And then I would spend countless hours thinking about it, feeling trapped in my own interpretation of what happened or in the meaning I have attached to the situation. 

But sometimes what now seems like a wonderful stroke of luck, might turn out to be something less fortunate after all, while a misfortune might bring you everything you ever wanted. Everything in life is cyclical and attaching meaning to every little thing that happens to you, is nothing but a big fat waste of time. 

I have now, learned to accept what happened for what it really is. I got fired. I broke up with my boyfriend. I had a fight with my brother. No matter what happened, I no longer stay attached to it, I do not try to interpret it, I do not foresee the end of the world because of it. No matter what it is, I now, know, it will eventually pass. After all nothing is permanent.

Good. Bad. Who knows? The story is not over yet.

So, now, no matter what happens, I take the time to internalise it properly, acknowledge it for what it really is, accept the feelings that emerge from my experience -anger, fear, joy, excitement- find the lesson or the blessing it carries and then I gently let it go. 

And no, it is not always easy. Sometimes I get a strong impulse to over-analyse what happened, to tell myself dramatic stories of how it is going to play out eventually, to have a definite opinion about why it happened and whether it was a good or a bad thing. But now, I have the tools to use to simply make peace with the moment, as it is and move on to the next one, keeping my commitment to living my best life.

After all, there are no guarantees in life, so no matter what happens make a conscious choice to experience, appreciate, learn and grow from it, until something new happens, a new experience that will carry you further on your way to the person you inspire to become. 

If you are ready to swift gears in your life and make the rest of 2013 ROCK?

The Inspired for Life Sessions, -Six Hours of infinite possibility infused coaching for 100$- will help you reach more into yourself and be empowered by your own dreams! 

What are you waiting for? 

Jump on this chance and Be Inspired for Life! 

Other Posts You Might Love:
7 Easy Steps To a Happy Life | Surprisingly Simple Ways To Living a Life of Happiness
Happiness | 5 Tips to help you work your way from grumpy to happy
Back to the Basics | The Importance of Picking your Battles in Everyday Life
Overcoming the Fear of Failure | How I Rejected the Illusions of Fear and you can too

About Me

Hi, I'm Nichole, and I am a Life Change Architect and a Motivational Speaker, Coaching, Writing and Running Workshops about Personal Growth and Positive Change. 

Connect with me on Facebook or email me at [email protected]

Did you like, what you just read? 
Join our mailing list, to receive our weekly email, directly at your inbox! 

Sign up for our free newsletter

Well, you can wait, if you want to. You can wait until you get a better job, until you have more money, until you find the perfect partner, until you kids are off in college, but really, haven’t you waited long enough?

I say, enough with the waiting. Life is happening right now. This is it.  This day, this moment, this is your life and it’s up to you, to make the best of it.

So, here are a few tips to help you embrace your every day life, experience joy and make the best of whatever comes your way, with grace.

Ready? Take a deep breath and get ready to kick it up a notch! 

• Wake up Early  If you have to be on the road by 8.30, make yourself a favour and don’t wake up at 8.00.  Set your alarm a few minutes before the chaos of the day sets in, so you can breathe, read a book, journal for a few minutes, sip your coffee in peace, make love, shave your legs, you name it… This way when the time comes for you to really get going, you will be ready for it all.

• Start your day with Gratitude  I cannot stress this enough. Every day, when you wake up make sure you start your day off with gratitude. Write down, think of or say aloud, at least one thing for which you are grateful, today. Small or large it doesn’t really matter. Expressing gratitude is also a powerful tool you can use whenever you need to feel better, in a short period of time. 

• Pick your Battles  Stop draining your self everyday, by making a conscious decision to stop power struggling with people, over things that have no importance whatsoever. Really, it’s that simple. Not all battles are fight-worthy so, pick yours wisely. Not everything is a crisis. Not everything is to be taken personally. Not everything is there to intentionally hurt you. That’s all I’m saying.

• Stay Connected with your Friends  Let’s admit it, friends make the world a better place. So today, do yourself a favour and connect with a friend. Just pick up the phone and have an actual conversation with someone you haven’t talked to in a while, write them an email or go out for a cup of coffee.  And while you are at it, let them know how much you appreciate them. It’s the greatest gift you can give yourself, today and you know it!

• Pamper yourself Silly  Sometimes all we need for a good battery recharge is a little indulgence.  So, take some time for yourself today.  Go for a walk, dim the lights and have a chilled glass of wine, get a mani, listen to some music. Whatever you do, use the time to tune into yourself and really enjoy your mini break.

• Meditate  It’s easy. Just sit down on a pillow, straighten your back, cross your legs, place your hands on your knees and breathe. That’s it. Focus on your breath, going in and out of your nostrils. You can set a timer  to five minutes, so you don’t open your eyes to check your watch every now and then. Just a few minutes of daily meditation can have enormous health benefits. Try it.

• Give yourself permission to screw up  Yes you can do that. Let go of the need to be perfect. Take a risk. Allow yourself  to fail.  You heard me. Stop placing unrealistic demands on yourself and accept the inevitability of making mistakes. 

Of course, I gotta ask…

What do you do daily to invite more happiness into your life? 
What simple activities or tricks do you use to keep yourself in tip-top spiritual, emotional and physical health? 

Do tell!

Other Posts You might Love:
29 Things You Didn't Know About Me | A Chance to Share and Connect
Kicking Stress in the Butt with Mini Meditation Sessions
Are you holding yourself back? | Break free from your own limiting beliefs, starting today
Reduce Daily Stress and Pamper yourself Silly with Small Acts of Self Care

About Me

Hi, I'm Nichole, and I am a personal motivator and coach, passionate about reigniting the spark in people both in life and business. My specialty? Getting people to ACT by breaking anything down, into to the next action! 

I work with passion driven women to help them set their priorities straight and and thrive in life and business, on their own terms.

Connect with me on Facebook or email me at [email protected]

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In fact, most of us were never taught to even say No, in the first place, never-mind saying it the right way; politely and firmly. I particularly was taught that saying No, was rude and selfish; no wonder I am now, a recovering people pleaser.   

As a life coach, I get to work with people who are going down the same path I did a few years back, willing to juggle a million different things rather than saying No to a plea for help, from a friend or a coworker, ending up having no time for themselves and in most cases unable to cultivate meaningful, mutually respectful relationships. 

For some people, especially women, the yearn for outside validation -aka low self esteem- is so strong that saying yes, becomes almost like a habit, to the person in question, that eventually fails to even notice the source of her frustration and disconnect to others. 

There it is, I said it, being a people pleaser is closely tied to low levels of confidence and self esteem, which means that you are putting everyone else's needs before yours and esteeming others above yourself, thus feeling compelled to agree to every request.