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Self Doubt vs Facts | Overcoming Self Doubt one Fact at a Time

10/25/2013

6 Comments

 

Self Doubt.

If there is one thing I know good enough to write about, it’s self doubt. Or maybe not, but that’s not the point.

The point is that we all have doubts. Whether you’re a supremely confident diva or a content Zen monk… it really doesn’t matter. You still have doubts about yourself and you know it.

Now, the question is...


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Are your doubts stopping you from pushing yourself beyond your comfort zone, living your dreams and leading the life you truly want to lead?

So, are they?

Mine were. I was one of those people who toiled for many years because I doubted my ability to be my own boss. I doubted whether I was good enough to become a solopreneur, to run my own business or to make a difference in people’s lives, in a world filled with extremely gifted life coaches.

And the sneaky thing about those doubts was that they presenting themselves through George – you know George, my inner critic, my sweet little gremlin – . And George used his cunning PR skills to trick me into submission without putting up a fight.

He wasn’t throwing them in my face, he was just covering up for them while they crept into my subconscious so that I didn’t realize they’re there, tugging at me, wearing at me, grinding me to a stop.

But these doubts were there, even if I rarely thought about them. They were that silent voice in my head saying, “I can’t do it. I’m not good enough. I’d never make it. I’d only fail and embarrass myself. Why should I dare dream?”

They were there, and still are some times, and they were more powerful than I can put into words.

If you hear a voice within you say "you cannot paint", then by all means paint and that voice will be silenced. ― Vincent van Gogh [tweet this]
So, I decided to start small, with a little facebook page. I posted quotes and thoughts I needed to keep ME motivated. A few people liked my page, and commented on my posts. That was a fact. Hmmm…

I kept doing it, and kept getting good feedback, even if it was just from a handful of people. They believed in me, and encouraged me to continue posting, by commenting, and sharing my posts with their friends. That was also a fact. Interesting…

My wonderful husband Stelios supported me. My friends were proud of me, and that was a fact too. Every new person who liked, commented or shared one of my posts provided me with another proof that what I was doing had an actual impact on people’s lives … and that was a fact too.

And with every new, undisputed fact that came in, I was becoming more and more sure that my old doubts, were wrong. They were just flimsy façades that I had built up into something so solid they seemed indestructible. They seemed so real they were unquestionable, the foundation for my everyday reality.

But they were wrong, and now I had facts and solid data to prove it. And the very realization made me shiver. How could everything I had believed all these years be so wrong?

My reality today is different, because even though I had doubts, I still went ahead and did it anyway. I started small and I tested the waters. I was mindful of the results. I paid attention. And though I still have self doubts, I no longer let them define my reality. They’re just hypotheses, waiting to be tested by actual facts, waiting to be disproved.

Everyone has self doubts. That’s no excuse of not living your life the way you like it best. Just start doing it!

I have done it, thousands of others have done it. We are not better than you, we just did something relatively small, to test our doubts and then waited for the actual data to come in. We got the feedback, we disproved our doubts and we kept going.

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I’m already proud of you, just for reading this far, even though you have doubts about me and this blog. And I am proud you are willing to let some small light shine on the doubts quivering in the darkness.

Have you ever doubted your self and your ability to live life on your terms?
How do you handle your doubts?


Share your truth in the comment section bellow. Remember, we are all in this together...
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Hi, I'm Nichole, and I am a Life Change Architect and a Motivational Speaker, Coaching, Writing and Running Workshops about Personal Growth and Positive Change. 

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6 Comments
Deborah
10/29/2013 11:35:37 pm

Nichole,
You seem to know exactly what to post at the perfect time for me.
I want to start my own business but I keep having doubts about it. One fact at a time sound just about perfect to me right now.

Reply
nichole link
11/4/2013 07:26:57 pm

So glad you found this useful Deborah.

The purpose of this blog is exactly that, to share useful information people can actually use to make their lives easier.

Blessings,

Reply
yiannis m
11/1/2013 03:51:57 am

Great article Nichole. Self-doubt is something that concerns everyone of us to a higher or lower degree. It's a feeling that it may conquer you and inhibit anything you are dreaming of.

One suggestion to overcome self-doubt as you said is to try things and prove your inner self that you are worthy of everything you desire to accomplish in life. 'The only way to do it is to do it' and 'do it now, there is no other time'. Then all of a sudden our little George inside is powerless and quite.

Reply
nichole link
11/4/2013 07:29:10 pm

'The only way to do it is to do it' and 'do it now, there is no other time'. Then all of a sudden our little George inside is powerless and quite.

Sometimes the comments are better than the posts themselves.
Thank you for taking the time to share this with us Yiannis.

Much Love,

Reply
Alie
11/4/2013 01:53:41 am

Thank you so much for sharing this simple trick, Nichole.

I believe that small successes can deliver a powerful break through self doubt.

Reply
nichole link
11/4/2013 07:27:49 pm

You are most welcome Alie!
Much Love,

Reply



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